I haven’t been through many breakups. Just one. Over and over again. I’m going through it again right now.
When is it over? I don’t know because it just hasn’t happened. I know I’ll be going to bed tonight but not before a few teardrops fall and a half a dozen cigarettes and 100 different trains of thoughts and getting angry at myself a few times and thinking ‘should I text him and ask if it’s really over?’.
I know I’ll be getting the advice of ‘moving on to bigger and better things’ but without some sort of closure I’m stuck in transit. No, scratch that.. I’m stuck in transit because I want to be. I don’t want to move on. A breakup is so hard and I know I don’t have the experience but heartbreak doesn’t get any easier even if it is done by the same person. Or caused by yourself.
I’ve heard it takes double the time of your relationship to get over that person. Really??? If so that sucks. I’ll have to check myself in a few more years. It’s so hard when you’ve spent so many years with someone and think that they are the ‘one’. Listening to songs, watching TV and relating everything to your relationship. Could this just have been the longest honeymoon period in a relationship?
I mean, I’m young; what do I really know about love, right?
But who makes up the rules of love?
Love is confusing and hurtful but has taught me so much about opening my heart and sharing myself in so many new ways, so much that I’m vulnerable. Even though it hurts so much I don’t think I would ever regret being as happy as I was.
